Rise: Gratitude for adversity
Today we officially enter what has become widely known as Gratitude Season. We collectively reflect on the year and “live, laugh, love” our way into the warm and fuzzy feeling associated with being thankful for blessings.
This year has been very successful for me and many others, but I am sure we have all faced some painful hardships. I have suffered my fair share of public humiliations, as some of my readers may know.
However, this year, I find myself glowing. Not from anger, embarrassment or resentment lighting me up from within (well, maybe a little) but from the peace of hard lessons learned — finally. There is a satisfaction in knowing that one finally gets it. The pain that comes with bad choices isn’t happening again. The cycle has ended, and you can rise from the ashes a better, stronger person.
My “gratitude challenge” this year isn’t about being grateful for the good things; it is about being thankful for the hard stuff. The awful, keep you up at night, unsure of what you are going to do things. The “how are you ever going to find the strength to face it” stuff. The “I’m so angry I’m going to burst into flames” moments.
Why?
Because we stood up, and we did it. We faced it. We handled it. We conquered it. And in that, we found not only the strength to be better, kinder, more thoughtful people, but we found the power to set better boundaries and take care of ourselves and our families. We stood up for ourselves. We defended each other. Whatever “it” was is done and dusted.
Don’t make the mistake of failing to recognize that no experience is a waste of time. Your past, both good and bad, has created the person you are today. Value the wisdom your downfalls gave you and remember that the only power your history should hold is the power to turn you into a better version of yourself.
Below are some musings I’ve had of late about the reason we should feel grateful even for those things no one in their right mind would be thankful for.
Challenges make us stronger people
When we choose to rise to the occasion instead of cowering in defeat, we become stronger, more determined, better in so many small and large ways. There is a pride that comes with fearlessness. There is a sense of security that quiets that spirit when you can trust yourself to rise and handle your life even if that means asking for the help you need to get through something.
Challenges make us more patient
Challenges sometimes make us suffer for a long time. Are you trying to get promoted at work? Are you struggling with your health or weight? Do you work and go to school?
There are a lot of challenges that can only be resolved/overcome with time. And with time comes patience. When we emerge on the other side of the trial, we emerge softer (or firmer, if you’ve been working out, lol!) and more patient.
Challenges change our perspective
Problems make us see our life differently. The goal is not to become embittered or jaded, but to develop the ability to see through others’ eyes, to pick up more wisdom and insight into the human condition.
Challenges create greater confidence
Knowing that you can endure a tough challenge offers a degree of confidence that the next trial can also be endured. You passed the test, your hair might be a mess, and your face is dirty, but you did it. And, you can do it again if you have to — next time with the benefit of hindsight. We often don’t realize how much strength we have until challenged to use it. Once tested, we know.
Things fall apart, including the perception of self. Every storm that destroys you holds a lesson. Your “happily ever after” isn’t the point of life, nor is it to harden yourself again hope. The point is to learn to rise from the ashes every time you get burned. Humility grows when your world shatters, and that is beautiful.
When life brings you to your knees, lean in, trust yourself, trust your higher power, and find the person you are at the bottom. Don’t run away from the lesson; embrace it.
